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Weirdest Clauses in NBA Players Contracts

What was once only simple dollar signs and stats in NBA contracts blossoms into a treasure trove of quirky clauses that beg the question: “Wait, they actually put that in writing?”

No Rodeo Riding Clause for Dirk Nowitzki

A clause actually existed in the contract for Dallas Mavericks legend Dirk Nowitzki that strictly forbade him from riding a rodeo. Why, you ask? Well, the team was rather concerned that Dirk might be thrown off by a bull and end up on the list of injured players. You can’t blame them a lot for wanting to keep their ace player safe at all costs, even if that meant no bull riding for Dirk. Imagine Dirk, in his signature one-legged fadeaway, trying to wrangle a runaway bronco. The Mavericks front office probably pictured their franchise player flat on his back, trampled, and they nixed any such cowboy ambitions Dirk might have had.

Kobe and D-Wade Say No to Skydiving Clause

Kobe Bryant and Dwyane Wade, the two of the NBA’s biggest stars, had clauses in their contracts that prevented them from participating in such high-risk activities as skydiving. Apparently, they thought these superstars might fall to the ground and sit out of a big game. No more jumping out of planes for these dudes! Can you imagine Kobe Bryant, in mid-dunk, realizing that he had left his parachute in his other jacket? D-Wade, in the midst of flight for a game-winning layup, getting sidetracked, thinking he’s about to hit the earth at terminal velocity? Obviously, the teams wanted to keep those stars with their feet on the ground, both literally and figuratively.

Amar’e Says Bungee Jumping is a No-Go Clause

Amar’e Stoudemire’s contract with the New York Knicks had a specific clause that banned him from bungee jumping. Seriously, who thought that was a good idea in the first place? Bungee jumping and basketball just don’t mix, I guess. Imagine Amar’e, mid-leap, suddenly realizing that he’s not supposed to be plummeting towards the ground with only a giant rubber band attached to his ankles. The Knicks must be petrified that their star player is now going to turn into a human yo-yo, bouncing up and down, missing huge games.

No Motorcycles Clause for KD and Kyrie

Well, stories go that two of the most electrifying players of the NBA have had clauses in their contracts that prohibit them from riding motorcycles in the middle of the season. Teams have to be concerned about having these guys end up caught in some fender-bender and sitting out a significant game. No more cruising on two wheels for these ballers! Can you picture KD cruising through traffic on a sweet motorcycle only to get sideswiped by a minivan? Or Kyrie, popping a wheelie and then promptly losing control and face-planting into a mailbox? The teams obviously wanted to keep their superstars safe and sound, with both feet firmly on the ground.

Elective Surgeries? Not So Fast! Clause

More often than not, NBA contracts restrict players from having elective medical procedures that could keep them sidelined for a long period. Teams need their players active on the court rather than on a table undergoing some sort of elective surgery. No nose jobs or tummy tucks during the season, please, players! Can you imagine a team getting horrified because one of the star players has decided he needs a fancy new hairline or six-pack in time for the playoffs?. Nope, no way, you’re staying in one piece until the season is over!” say the teams.

Gambling? Not on Our Watch! Clause

Mostly, players are strictly forbidden from gambling, especially on NBA games. You can guess the reasons: some really fundamental ones about conflict of interest and integrity. Teams don’t want their players wagering bets on themselves or their opponents. Thus, no more Vegas trips for these guys during the season! Can you imagine a player making a huge bet on their team to win and then tanking the game on purpose? The teams come back and say, “Uh-uh, no way, you’re not going to be throwing games or lining your own pockets on our watch!”

Gotta Make Those Appearances Clause

Contracts can require players to make a certain number of public appearances or promotional events for the team. The teams want their players to be good ambassadors of the franchise, even if it is at the cost of signing autographs and taking selfies with fans. Picture a player attempting to slip out of an arena in the wake of a disappointing loss, only to be cornered by his team’s PR manager and made to smile and wave for the cameras. They’re all, “Sorry, buddy, you signed up for this, now get out there and make us look good!”

Dress to Impress Clause

The NBA has a league-wide dress code that players must adhere to, both on game days and during team functions. No longer will they be able to arrive at the arena in pajamas or ripped jeans. These guys gotta look sharp in their suits and ties! Imagine a player driving to the stadium in his favorite sweatpants and ratty T-shirt only to be turned away by the security guard. The teams are like, “No way, buddy; on my watch, you’re gonna look professional, even if it kills you.”

Keep It Clean on Social Media Clause

Some teams limit the use of social media by players, especially with respect to comments concerning the team or league; so, in effect, teams do not want players to air dirty laundry or trash-talk on Twitter. Better keep those hot takes to yourself, players! Imagine a player going on a rant about their coach’s terrible play-calling and receiving a stern warning from the team social media manager. The teams are all, “Hey, keep it positive and keep it off the internet, or else!”

Loyalty Has Its Rewards Clause

Contracts can include financial rewards for players who stick around with the same team for a while, an incentive to not jump ship. Teams need to keep their stars happy and in the fold, even if that means tossing an extra few million their way for being loyal. Imagine a player getting a huge bonus just for sticking around with the same team for 5 or 10 years. All of the teams are like, “We will pay you to be our one-team wonder, as long as you don’t go jumping ship to the competition!”

There you go, folks – the wackiest NBA contract clauses that’ll leave you wondering, “What were they thinking?” From no rodeo riding to no bungee jumping, the teams just do not care about holding back on stoppers to keep the players safe, happy, and court-bound. Who knows what else is hiding within these multi-million-dollar deals? One thing is certain: on and off the court, the NBA will never lack surprises!